Lent day two

I don't do New Years resolutions but I do try to do Lent,

So, got back on Monday and I have been DOING constantly, not useful tick-off-my-list stuff but I've been spending time with friends etc, all very essential. It just so happens that Lent has given me the perfect opportunity to change my ways, and kind of have my very own new years.

So Shrove tuesday I didnt actually have pancakes, fail I know. you see I was going to make them for breakfast, perfect, but then dad said he was going to make them later, so I never made them, then I just pottered about and went for a bit of a social call.

Wednesday, I got a fab new hair cut, I went to see my friend in class who studying hairdressing at college and helped her get a few assesments ticked off while being pampered for a few hours with head massagey hair washing and cutting and layering and cutting some more. She did a super job and I got an amazing new hair style, AND tips on how to style it dead easily for a small donation towards materials. Seriously go and check out a hair college near you (I went to Blackpool and the Fylde college), I've always been like, ugh, I don't know what to do with my hair... so I pretty much gave her free reign to cut away

So while having my 'do' done, I was contemplating and discussing what to give up for lent... drum roll please.......

I am giving up Crisps and Alcohol. and taking up Pilates.

So far so good.

feeling very refreshed x

well now then Doley bum....

(really, that isnt as funny unless you have a brain like me that sings everything, if you think of the Arctic monkeys song, Mardy bum, you'll get it. but it's not funny, because i've just explained it.... Damn!)

I just signed on for the first time EVER, ooooooooh. I'm both a little bit let down, because of the stigma of the usual locals who hang around the Job Centre and a little bit smug that I can blast the usual stereotype. The expectations in the eyes of the Personal Assistant and the security guards, ooooh, kiss my unemployed, skinny jean covered ass.

*my ponderings in no way shape or form cover every single PA or security guard or unemployed person on benefits*

[Scene] I walk down the road, lined with broken down B&B's held together by chip board and scaffolding, cross the road and past a group of flourescent jacketed builders, and yes, I did shake my hair and smile to myself / feel a bit grubby when I see them watching me walk past (must have been a slow day for creeping)

The air is grey, as is the road, the buildings, the clouds and if my mood could be colour coded, that would be grey too, the only colour around is the faded attempts at tourist-attracting signage.

So after a bit of time wasting on the prom, (I was almost an hour early)

 {I'll let you into a bit of a secret too, while I'm here, When I'm alone, like walking home or sat wasting time like today, I have a little howl into the wind, I mean I sing. Random lines of random songs}

I make my way to the dreaded Benefit interveiw.....

So, I went in, through the obligatory group of people smoking, sipping from cans, shouting at eachother, into the realm of the benefits office and am confronted by a hulk of a bouncer disguised as a civil servant (his job title is probably something like, customer welcoming and order assistant) who takes my name and tells me to go upstairs and sit on the sofa. of course, I'm ten minutes early, I've been brought up that way, but turns out, they tell you your appointment is ten minutes earlier than it actually is, so I have to wait 20 minutes, on a sofa in the middle of an office. It's like being in a zoo. But I sit there, reading the Times Education Supplement and get some funny looks while doing so, I felt like screaming...

YES, HELLO!!! I CAN READ!! GET BACK TO JUDGING PEOPLE AND ORGANISING YOUR WEEKEND.

Then I get called over by.... we shall call her Deirdre, who takes my details, asks what work I've done, my qualifications, my health.... Wait, what's that... that look on your face, dear deirdre? No, I'm not lying, why would I? yes, a clean driving license, No I wasn't KICKED out of uni and I didn't FAIL...

Yes deirdre, I can manage to apply for 6 jobs a week, it's not a problem...

6 to ten days for my first payment? wow, thanks, thats great news, Crisis loan? Um, no, I'll be ok, thanks, really, I'm pretty sure I'm not in crisis, I can still apply? oh... um.... nah your ok....

so she didn't say all of that, but you know when you can sense what a person means  or wants to say, the tilt of the head, the raised eye brow.... 


So there..... pretty painless I guess and yes, I am luckier than most, I have a lovely set of parents that are willing to keep me warm and fed and support me in my decisions, even though I have eaten 12 fish fingers and half a block of cheese in the last two days and I am totally grateful that I live in a country that can support people in a time of need, I'm not, however,  proud that people ride the system, but good lord, it sounds like it'd be pretty easy to do.

Best get back to eating my way to type 2 diabetes and filling my quota of 6 job applications for the week.

X

3031 veiws! yeah baby!

Ducking hell, I cant believe how many people read this!

Now just before you start rolling your eyes, I'm not doing this to be popular/get as many veiws as possible or become famous etc etc, I just write my blog because... I do. But yay!

I wrote My first Post in February of this year, so thats, what, almost 10 months ago, in some ways, I've grown in those ten months, in some ways I'm still the same. It also means I've been single for 10 months, as when I started blogging, I'd made alot of big decisions, decided to quit my job, to work abroad, to put an end to my long term relationship, to find myself again (as cheesy as that sounds) and to live more.

so now I'm making decisions again.

I just wanted to Thank YOU for reading my blog so far, and by YOU I mean family, friends, fellow bloggers and those people who have stumbled across my blog while searching for things like....

• being accident prone
  
• is my brain shrinking?
  
• rule number 23
  
• a sneaky wee
  
• pig bellies
  
• can I give myself whiplash?
  
• My mind is complicated

Honest to god, these are how some people have come across day dreams from feef, I dont know wehter that says more about my writing, or how random people are...

Love you lots,

New posts coming soon :-D

Love children, couldn't eat a whole one though

The above statement is almost entirely true. I do very much love most children, but I couldn't even eat a tiny bit of one, that would be both disgusting and cruel.

I am loving spending so much time with L and M (my neice and nephew) and big sis. it's lovely, I'm part of their routine at the moment. Each morning, me and BS are usually bombarded with the kids at about half 6, then somehow breakfast gets made, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday I take M to school and L goes with BS to nursery, then I pick him up again at 1 and we chill out till BS brings M home from school and usually theres a mad rush for dinner before I go to work. Thursday and Friday it's been just me and the little dude, usually making a mess, sticking, playing cars and generally getting into trouble. Tommorow for instance is Duvet and DVD day.

Did I tell you I got a job? I'm back to waitressing, which I haven't done since I was 18 and working in the pub. It's hard work, very physical, running back and fore with plates piled up or lined up 3 along your arm at once... I've been there since the week I came here, whats that, three weeks now? gosh, time fly's! It's going ok, I've not f**ked up too much, and i'm getting into the swing of things. I have to keep telling myself to keep thinking of the money.

So back to the kids, They are super super cute, and clever and funny. for the most part I think they like having me around, although me and the boy don't get on until past 10am, I don't know what it is, he just doesn't like me until then, though once you've got your head around it, it works out OK.

BS keeps trying to hire me out as a children's entertainer or something, (I say keeps, she's mentioned it like twice) The kids think I'm nuts, dancing and singing and skipping to school, poor little mites, a trip to or from school is not just a trip to and from school with Aunty 'nona, it's a language lesson, dance party, treasure hunt olympic games, singalong extravenganza!

It's awesome to be around kids at christmas time too, we had a super time the other night putting all the decorations up

We've been for breakfast with santa and his raindeer,

fed the ducks,

and I've watched exquisite performances of two plays,

Children of the world

and, Whoops a daisy angel.

Merry Christmas! (almost)